Me and My Dogs


"Embers" is due out this year, not sure when, but start checking back for updates around July! It would be great if it could appear on July 4th, because that was when I was supposed to be born. Instead, I was born on July 1st, because the night before, my mom hit a dog on the road. She freaked out so bad that she went into labor. So, people, a dog gave its life so I could be born on July 1st. Maybe that's why dogs gyrate towards me.


I went to visit my friend, who owns one of those annoying rat dogs. It raced into the room, jumped on my knee, and started barking at everybody, even at its owner.

I used to visit another lady, who's now dead, and her dog always hopped in my lap and went to sleep. It snapped at everybody else.


Someone had a whole theater inside his basement, so me and a bunch of other people went there to see "The Watcher In The Woods." I'd never seen it before. The guy owned a big, beautiful Golden Retriever. Everybody ran to pet it and wanted it to sit by them. I took a bean bag at the front of the room to watch. Next thing I know, the dog was watching the show with me.

I had to baby-sit a couple of nuts who had just gotten a new dog. The little thing followed me all over the place and stayed in my lap when I sat down.


Nobody could understand it, and I can't either. I've never been able to own a dog, so maybe the dogs all knew it? I've always wanted a British Bulldog, because they look so funny, until a woman said they leave their snot all over the place. I'm not about throwing up every day.

Anyway, get ready for the exciting sequel to "Pariahs," making its debut this year. Its in the final stages! I love it, so you should, too! Yes? No? Maybe so?

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