Growing Plants

Can't get your plants to grow? You ordered some delicate roses from across the sea and they all died? The plants were flourishing in the gardens you bought them from, and then dropped dead in yours? Do they end up looking like this?

I hear tell you need manure, worms, and a lot of watering. Some plants are fussy and die if there's a slight frost, or you don't give it that exact inch of water once a week at exactly 3:32 PM.

Well, there's a simple fix for people who aren't anywhere near a green thumb. Buy your plants from Walmart, K-Mart, and basically any other grocery store. Because if the plant can survive there, it can survive anywhere.

Take the rosebush Dede. I bought it from K-Mart. It survives in the snow, it survives in drought. I don't water it most of the time. It's in bad soil, and still it grows. The roses from the special gardens are fussy. They need an exact temperature and humidity, and some have dropped dead.

What about my little white flowers from Smith's? They survived an eleven hour drive from one state to another, dropped in the ground, endured frost, heat, snow, and they're still alive. I don't water them all the time either.

Another good flower is irises. You don't even have to plant those. You can just throw the roots somewhere and they'll dig themselves into the ground and grow. Barren ground, fertile ground, it doesn't matter. Just be sure to pull off the dead leaves after winter's over, and make sure some of the root is exposed to the sun.

So if you're not fussy, buy non-fussy plants, and bam, you got yourself a fussless garden.