Read this and guaranteed, 100%, you'll stay on your diet!
Having a hard time keeping on your diet? Does that food smell too good? Have no fear! You will stay on it. This is fail safe!
One day, there was a boy. He ate everything. He tried everything. He didn't even look at what he was trying until it was too late. There was a group of men using a pop can to spit their tobacco in. They didn't bother throwing it away and left it on the table. This crazy boy went over there after they had left, snatched up the can, and took several gulps before he realized what he was drinking.
Now, over here on Apache land, the Apaches were having a giant eat. A woman was mixing a massive potato salad in a metal trashcan--with her arms. She hadn't shaved in about a month, and hadn't bathed all day, so she was the grease queen. The mayonnaise stuck to all her armpit hairs. She then served everybody the potato salad.
Many years ago, a boy decided to take his little four-year-old niece next door to make friends with another four-year-old. He put them on the play-set and said he would be back in a little while. The little boy and girl gazed at one another. The little boy had a large green booger, like a slug, sliding out of his nose. He sucked it in, but it came back out. It dribbled onto his lips. He sucked it in again, but the green slug with yellow stripes oozed out. He finally licked it into his mouth.
One day, it was a marvelous day in grade school. They were having pizza for lunch. One little boy got himself a bunch of Ranch to dip his pizza in. He told everyone to try it. He said it was the most wonderful thing ever. He demonstrated. He dipped the pizza in and shoved it in his mouth, but he couldn't keep the food in. Ranch and red sauce dribbled from his mouth, stringing in his saliva like spiderwebs. He sucked his saliva up and said, "See? That's how you do it." Red and white stuck in his teeth, along with chewed up pizza bread. More drool stretched from his lips and dribbled on his shirt. He didn't understand why no one would try it. The cafeteria women had no idea why there was a bunch of pizza in the trashcan that day.
(This isn't me, because if it was, all the nails would be bitten off)
Now, over here on Apache land, the Apaches were having a giant eat. A woman was mixing a massive potato salad in a metal trashcan--with her arms. She hadn't shaved in about a month, and hadn't bathed all day, so she was the grease queen. The mayonnaise stuck to all her armpit hairs. She then served everybody the potato salad.
Many years ago, a boy decided to take his little four-year-old niece next door to make friends with another four-year-old. He put them on the play-set and said he would be back in a little while. The little boy and girl gazed at one another. The little boy had a large green booger, like a slug, sliding out of his nose. He sucked it in, but it came back out. It dribbled onto his lips. He sucked it in again, but the green slug with yellow stripes oozed out. He finally licked it into his mouth.
One day, it was a marvelous day in grade school. They were having pizza for lunch. One little boy got himself a bunch of Ranch to dip his pizza in. He told everyone to try it. He said it was the most wonderful thing ever. He demonstrated. He dipped the pizza in and shoved it in his mouth, but he couldn't keep the food in. Ranch and red sauce dribbled from his mouth, stringing in his saliva like spiderwebs. He sucked his saliva up and said, "See? That's how you do it." Red and white stuck in his teeth, along with chewed up pizza bread. More drool stretched from his lips and dribbled on his shirt. He didn't understand why no one would try it. The cafeteria women had no idea why there was a bunch of pizza in the trashcan that day.
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